CrUnChY Birth Stories

Caleb's Birth Story 6.18.2004

Calebs Birthstory as copied from my labor diary.....
I couldn't wait for the day I'd go into labor.I spent hours looking through books and magazines,reading everything I could about labor and delivery.
Well,after several 'is this it?' occurances,I really thought on the morning of June 17th,2004 which was my due date,that MAYBE,it was 'it!'
I had cramping from 5:30-7:30am and then it just quit.
So,when contractions started at 4:30 that afternoon,I didn't really think it was anything.My husband (at the time Jeff.........) went ahead and went to work.
But then the contractions were coming every 9,then7,then 5 minutes and lasting 30-60 seconds (I know this because I was staring at the clock!!).
By 6:30 the contractions were 3-5 minutes apart and lasting 60-70 seconds.
I called my mom to come be with me...And of course she was outside.But my brother was still living at home and I told him in a quivery voice "I need mom,I think I am in labor...."
I didn't want it to be 'false'-the contractions were really light and in my back like period cramps.
My mom came over and after an hour we called Dr Tim.He said "Go to the hospital and have them check you".
I called my husband (yep,that would've been Jeff..........) who said he's meet us there.
We arrived at the hospital at 8pm and the triage nurse checked me and said I was dilated to 3-ish CM.
She hooked up to monitors for about 30 minutes.
Dr Hoekstra suggested I walk the halls for about an hour to get things moving.
The contractions weren't too bad-I swayed my hips and had *Jeff rub my back and I just breathed.
Dr Hoekstra came to check me about 9:30pm and I was 4cm.....Then she wanted to break my water,I said "No way!! I want to use the jacuzzi!!"
She then said "Fine,if you want a 16 hour labor instead of 8 hours,I will see you later tomorrow!" She obviously wasn't happy that I wanted a little control of my labor....
My nurse took me to my labor and delivery room and monitored me for a little while.My mom filled the jacuzi tub for me.
My contractions were getting more intense,but not unbearable.
I got in the tub at 10pm and it felt so relaxing in the warm water with the jets on my back.
I was in the water for about an hour and my nurse wanted to check my progress.
When she tried to do the exam,she couldn't tell for sure,so she went and got another nurse-a hefty woman I remember who was a little rough when she checked me.....
I was 8cm at 11pm....I remember being excited because I'd dilated 4cm in an hour!!
Dr Hoekstra came in and checked me too,sure enough 8cm.
Then she dropped the bomb."I need to break your water now....it's slowing your labor down"
By this time it was about 12 midnite and when she broke the bag of waters it felt like I'd peed myself!
Then they put the monitors back on me much to my dismay....I'd wanted to use the birthing ball.
Then my contractions started getting really intense.
*Jeff was telling me that I didn't have to 'suffer' and I was getting really nervous about the pushing part.My back was hurting so bad and I was losing my concentration because I stopped believing in myself.
I decided to go ahead and ask for pain medication.
They talked to me about the options and we choose Demerol.
By the time they ordered the meds and were putting in the IV,I felt a lot of pressure.This was about 2am.My nurse was fighting to get a good vein for the IV meds....
They made me use a little oxygen which I hate and it made me feel like throwing up.I refused anymore,but they told me I had to breathe.I said "I AM breathing!!"
I felt pressure down below and I said "I feel like I gotta go!" (this is what everyone said it would feel like and it's not a joke.....)
I kept repeating "I've gotta push!!"
My nurse checked me and I had an anterior lip (where a side of the cervix hasn't fully opened) and my nurse had me push while she held the non-dilated cervix out of the way....OUCH!
She then said "Here we go!"
I grabbed my knees and tucked my chin,took a deep breath and PUSHED! It felt great!
My nurse said she could see a glimpse of the babys head.
Then,she told me to hold off for a couple contractions.....I was screaming,trying not to push ( I'm not really sure about why,but I just 'obeyed').
Then she said"Okay,lets go" and I pushed for 10 seconds each time. I was SCREAMING!!
She told me to "Push past the stinging,burning pain-which I didn't feel.
Pusing was a relief,but I got scared thinking I could be doing this for 'hours'. I got overwhelmed-I still had to get him out of there!!
I pushed for 35 minutes (they say,but it felt like 5 minutes...) and my nurse kept saying " He's got hair".
I said " I can't do this!!" Mom and *Jeff said "We can see his head!".
My nurse then said in a somewhat anxious tone "Don't push honey!!!" And I wasn't.
She ran to call Dr Hoekstra-I felt the baby moving down and out!
Dr Hoekstra rushed in the room and was putting on her gown and gloves.
She ran over and delivered his shoulders-well,she pretty much caught him just in time!!
I felt him slip out.I saw him all greyish and slimy looking-his cord was all spirally and I felt it still attached-so weird!
She clamped his cord and asked if *dad wanted to cut it and he did.
My baby boy was crying,I was crying.I was so relieved!
My legs were all shaky...My mom stayed by me while *Jeff went over by the baby.
I was so happy,and my mom seemed emotional,but happy too.
Dr Carolyn asked me to push to deliver the placenta,that part was easy!
And of course THIS is when my pain meds kicked in.
I had a slight tear,but it only took a couple of stitches.She gave me some local anethesia and a couple minutes later I was good to go....
I got to hold my baby and he seemed to recognize my voice.
After our first 'failed' attempt at breastfeeding,they took Caleb for his first bath while I got cleaned up.
I got back in to bed-the demerol had made me sleepy.
We worked on breastfeeding and Caleb didn't want to be away from me-which I didn't mind.
I was so happy that I had pretty much had the natural birth that I'd wanted-at least most of my labor I'd made it through without medication.
My birth team was so supportive and now I have a little bundle of joy.
My mom was really helpful.I'm glad she was there-we're much closer now.
I can't express how amazing Calebs birth was.
It's a beautiful thing and I think everyone should witness the miracle of birth!
Caleb





Jeremiah's Birth Story 6.18.2008

I was 3 days over due and ready to have my baby..My doctors wanted to induce,but I wanted something more natural..I called a midwife friend of mine,Linda, and she suggested a castor oil concoction...I tried it (chased with peanut butter!) laid down for a bit and within 3 1/2 hours I was having real contractions...They were mild,but painful enough that I knew with them coming and going that it was time!

I was home with Caleb and Matt was on his was over..I leaned over my birth ball and realized that it was more painful than I'd remembered it being with Caleb.I decided it would be more comfortable in the bath tub so I took a hot bath.
I remember sitting in the tub,having contractions and watching my belly get hard and mound up where the baby was.
Matt got to my house and my contractions were very irratic..Not time-able at all....Since this was my second baby I wanted to get to the hospital pretty soon so I wouldn't be delivering him at home! (my first labor was 10 hours...and I figured this one would go faster)

We went to the hospital at 6:00 pm and they checked I was only 3 cm dilated.
My mom showed up,as well as my dad who took Caleb to their house.
I was monitored for a bit and then they admitted me and got me to my room....
I used the jacuzzi tub for a while and then was checked I was 4 cm.
Then my stand-in doctor came in to 'examine' me and attempted to break my water without warning or asking me!
I of course told her "No" and she wasn't too happy (apparently docs think that breaking your water makes things go faster,but I know differently) and I walked for an hour or so.
Then I used the tub again..At 11:00 pm I was still only at 5 cm,BUT I was completely thinned out and my nurse said things would go much faster after that....
I was having the WORST back labor (even worse than my first labor) and the nurses kept asking if I wanted pain medication..I kept saying no (even though I was in terrible pain....ERRRR) and I just breathed my way through every contraction and kept thinking "Just get through THIS contraction"....
I felt the worst 'hollowing' feeling and I was desperate to have my baby-the pain was so overwhelming!
The problem was that my contractions were all over the place;Some were back-to-back and I didn't get a break...

I was sqeezing my mom and Matts hands and begging them to push on my lower back 'harder'!! (Counter pressure relieved some of the horrible pain!!)And when Matt would leave my side I would get very anxious because I just wanted the pain to be relieved by him pushing on my back and hips.
The nurse checked me around 12:15 AM because I was feeling pressure down there and she said I was almost at 7 cm and the pressure was because the baby's head was 'right there'...
Every contraction I felt un-bearable pressure for 10 seconds or so;My contractions were about 1 minute long and were coming all over the place.....
I used Calebs picture during some of the contractions as a focal point.
Matt kept using a cold cloth on my face(I was burning up!!) and I kept crying it hurt so bad...I just wanted to be done!!

The nurse just KEPT checking me because I kept feeling so much pressure like I needed to push;she'd check about every 10 minutes or so and everytime I was showing progress....
By 1:00 am they knew I was really close.
They started setting things up and had me get into position,which was semi reclined and with my feet in dreadful stirrups;which honestly,I just wanted to deliver my baby and didn't feel like arguing.
They couldn't get a good reading on baby's heartrate with the external monitor,so they inserted an internal,again I didn't feel like arguing and it was them playing the 'bad mommy card'.

At 1:15 am they told me to push and I didn't take it as a joke..I pushed through 2 contractions-which was about 4 pushes and then they told me to stop because the baby had the cord around his neck (it wasn't wrapped,just like he was slipping through it on his was out) and they suctioned him...Then I pushed about 2 more times during the next contraction and at 1:20 am, there he was!! He came out really fast because I really bared-down and pushed for only about 5 minutes...Matt cut the cord and they placed Jeremiah on my chest and wiped him down...He was 7lbs 9oz and 20 inches long and had some slight bruising from his fast trip out...I suffered no tears,YAY!...All I could say was "Hi baby,you're here" and "I did it,I'm done!!" . All while crying I was so happy and relieved to be done and have a healthy baby!!

It was one of the most amazing experiences of my life (Calebs birth being the other!) and I'm very greatful to my mom and Matt who were so supportive and made an amazing birth team.
I had pretty much the birth experience that I'd wanted and in the end feel very empowered to have done it without pain medication (not that I blame anyone for wanting it!!) and I'm estatic to have my baby boy in my arms!!
I gave birth to Jeremiah on Calebs 4th birthday,so it's really extra special..I am so happy I now have the two most precious boys in the world!
Breastfeeding is going pretty good,with a few rough spots here and there,but over all I predict a good nursing experience for Jeremiah and I.
He is a pretty quiet baby and only cries when his diaper is changed and when he is kept waiting too long for his food!
I anticipate that Caleb and Jeremiah will be close in the future and that I am the most blessed mommy on the planet:)
Jeremiah



Payton's Birth Story 8.26.2009

It's Wednesday,August 26 2009-my due date.....
6:30 am-After having little sleep,I get woken up by "Mommy,suns just up"...ugh,I think,I'm so tired!!"Caleb,mommy will be up in just a minute,go play quietly please"..This is my useless attempt at an additional 10-15 minutes of much desired sleep..."Mommy,I'm just hungry"...The whininess wins and I throw off my sheet!!

8:00 am-The boys are fed breakfast and it's time to take Caleb to daycamp-and I get a much needed break for the day! I've known for the last few days that anyday now could be my last one with Jeremiah at home as my little baby.....

9:30 am-Jeremiah is playing so nicely and I'm able to lay down on the couch for a bit..I also get some laundry done.I decide that 'what the hey' I'll take some castor oil and see if it gets things moving,after all it only works if things are ready,right?

12:00 noon- Jeremiah is down for his nap and I watch 'Baby story' and 'Deliver Me' episode after episode..I'm not sure why I put myself through it-I cry with every birth and I get more anxious for my 'time' to arrive.The castor oil hasn't taken effect yet and I report this to Matt when he calls on his lunch.

2:00 pm- I start getting some mild cramping and decide to go for a walk...I get more cramps,but they're all over the place...I fold laundry,do dishes,feed the pets,dust and try to stay upright...I watch 'Birthday' I suppose hoping that watching it will send signals to my cervix to dilate......I wait for Matt to show up.

3:00 pm-I take a long shower now that Matt's here...I call mom and tell her that this might or may not be the day,I'll keep her posted...The cramping is still all over the place and at times I go for 20 minutes without any...We go for a short walk and then go up to Felpausch to grab a few things...

4:30 pm-Time to head off to get Caleb-the vans are late getting him back to pick up site...I call mom to tell her that I'm not really cramping all that regular or more intensely yet,so it probably won't be today.

5:00 pm-I start to get really bad back cramps and they are getting more intense-I go inside the office and ask when my son will be there because I'm having contractions...Caleb gets there about 5:10 pm-we go home and I call my mom and tell her that 'This is it'..I need her to pick up the boys at 6:30 so I can get them supper and she can take them to her house and get them in bed before coming up to the hospital to be with me. I also figure this will be good since I can labor at home for another hour or so and I'll have progressed more when I get to Labor and Delivery (nothing like showing up and only being 3 cm dilated!).I help Matt feed the boys their pizza and I keep getting contractions-some as close as 1 minute apart,some lasting 15 seconds others almost a minute or so...I call Dr Tim and tell him that I'm having contractions and he asks "How far apart are they"?..I tell him that just like my other labors I never really get 'regular' contractions...He tells me it must be 'false labor' then...hah! I agree to lay down and time them and call him back.

6:30 pm-My contractions are getting more intense-more in my back and that really deep hollowing feeling of pain from my cervix dilating (at least that's what I pin it on!) I'm starting to moan during contractions which tells me that if I can't breathe quietly then things are in motion...I labor (get this!!) in my parking lot awaiting my mothers arrival to get the boys..My neighbors ask if I'm locked out of my house and I respond (between deep breaths) that I'm in labor and waiting for someone to pick up my boys.This leaves them shocked! A pregnant laboring woman outside in the parking lot?surely they must offer assistance.....My mom finally shows up and I kiss my boys goodbye and Matt and I climb into the Van.We drive almost 3 miles before I get a contraction..But then another immediantly follows that one-how irritating is that??

7:00 pm-We arrive at the hospital and I have contractions all the way up to Labor and Delivery-about 5 of them in the 5 minutes from the Van to the doors of L&D.I go to the desk and tell them I'm in labor and I'm pre-registered-hah! Not..My paperwork got lost...I do fine for about 5 minutes-No contractions..Then as I'm filling out my 'emergency contact' I get another contraction...They move me into triage figuring they'd have time to finish paperwork in there.

7:15 pm-I'm in a 'gown' which I can't stand and the strap is broken! I'm having really bad contractions in my lower back and that 'hollowing' pain in my cervix is really getting annoying..They need me to lay down and get hooked up to moniters etc...They ask if I plan on an epidural-I say "I want one,but I'm not going to get one"....They ask how the pain is on a 'scale from 1-10' I say "Compared to how it's going to be,-6"!!My nurse checks me and I'm already 5-6 cm and 90% effaced!! Wow..Matt comes back in the room and I tell him-we're in shock!Matt and the nurse leave the room (something about something to drink and calling the doctor) and I realize "Somebody needs to call my mom"!!!!Matt gets back and calls her and she is getting Jeremiah in bed and she'll come right up.

7:25 pm-We head down to my labor and delivery room (which is not ready-I guess they figure I'll give them plenty of time to get things set up) I have one contraction on the way there.I have about 2-3 more contractions and then I get into bed for my 'decent strip' of babys heartrate on the monitor...I'm not happy,but I'll do it.

7:30 pm-Dr Tim comes in and says he's going to check me and break my water...."I don't want my water broken yet" I say...He's not listening to me. "We need to break the water to make sure there's no meconium or distress"....I asked if I'll be able to get up at all. "You're too far into this to be getting up" I'm ticked off by now....I tell him that I'm requesting a different doctor..He says there isn't one...Finally after my nurse intervenes with her 'understanding nature' I agree that Dr Tim can 'check' my progress...

7:45 pm-I hear my mom say "I'm her mom" and I'm relieved she made it in time and maybe she'll help me stick up for myself...Dr Tim is still checking me and say's "You're at 8 cm and 90 %"..This part still pisses me off.I give in to be a 'good mom' and allow him to strip the membranes.......He's 'nice' enough to mention after-the-fact that things will start to get intense.He's not joking-they get intense right away!But the contractions get pretty regular-about 90 seconds apart and lasting about 40 seconds I guess.They continue to ask me questions inbetween contractions (things they normally ask in triage and have TIME to ask before things get intense)

8:00 pm-The pain in my back is horrible! I feel the most intense pain and I just breathe a deep "Oooohhhh" Like actually saying 'O',over and over.I'm burning up and I remind Matt that we need a thing of ice water to dip a cloth into for my head.My mom keeps bringing it over to me...fresh and icy-cold.Matt was pushing on my back as hard as he could through each contraction to create counter-pressure.I keep saying "I don't like this,it hurts" and "Please,I just want to get this over with"I'm getting tired.The pain is barely bearable-but what choice do I have at this point?I can only take one contraction at a time and hope it's the last one before I can deliver my baby.At least that's what they keep telling me-"You're doing good Denee,this could be one of your last contractions,breathe honey".......I enter this state of mind where I'm in my own way-it's kinda spiritual and a total body experience...Only I can do this and I HAVE to deliver this baby.There is no way out but one,for me and this baby.I have to get through this,just THIS contraction..It was a big blur.I'm checked a couple of times and I'm finally at 9 cm and 100%...It's moving so quickly,yet I'm so worn out already...weird.

8:15 pm-I feel slight pressure at the begining of a couple of contractions and the nurse checks me and says I have an 'anterior lip' (I had that with Caleb too) which is where you're fully dilated except one side is still slightly intact.Basically I'm 9.5 cm and she says I can probably start pushing and push through it...That was all I needed to hear-it confirmed my desire/need to push.....

8:17 pm-The nurse went in the hall and I heard her telling the doctor "She's ready" He told her to have me go ahead and start.I was on my side and the urge just 'took over'....I knew I needed to flip to the 'basic' delivery position on my back and I was 'involuntarily' pushing the whole time...I kept saying "I'm pushing"!!!! Over and over...I remember making this noise,like a 'hummmm' or something,it was like a relief...

8:18 pm-I felt SO much pressure and I couldn't stop from pushing even though Matt was freaking out telling me "Hunny,don't push..breathe"!!Nobody else was telling me not to push,so I kept pushing-I did try to stop and 'pant' at one point,but I couldn't,so I assisited the baby and my uterus in the delivery process.It felt awesome...The doctor was getting on his gown and there was a nurse next to me and a couple of nurses rushing about across the room.But NOBODY was at my feet!!I couldn't exactly hold off for these people!

8:19pm-I felt his head crowning and the doctor rushed over with ONE glove on to catch my baby...It was such an easy delivery-painful,but the pushing stage was like a breeze!Dr Tim clamped the cord and I remember telling him "Matt wants to cut it"! after the cord was cut,they placed Payton on my belly and I just kept saying, "I did it,thank you"! "You're here baby" And I was rubbing him and crying......I was SO glad it was over and he was okay.I just held him close and wept in pure happiness.It went so fast I could hardly blink,but it was amazing!!!

They left Payton with me for quite awhile and only took him when I was ready.I didn't tear and was able to start nursing within just a while of giving birth and Payton is a pro little nurser!Later the nurse and Dr Tim both came in and needed me to sign a 'consent to deliver' form-SO FUNNY..What if I'd refused?!?! Hahaha.
Payton



Jacobi's Birth Story 6.12.2011

38 weeks 5 days pregnant with Jacobi:
I'm filled with mixed emotions...This has been a different pregnancy experience for me,a lot of up's and down's and I'm not sure how to handle my feelings.
A part of me is ready to have him and hold him.But then there is a part of me that enjoys having him safely tucked in my belly,feeling his kicks and the feeling of his regular bouts of hiccuping.
I am sore.I am irritable.I am tired of the heartburn and not being able to roll-over in bed without severe discomfort.

38 weeks 6 days:
4:00AM-contraction....At first I thought I was dreaming that I was in pain.Then I woke up and discovered I really was.
I'd never had false labor-only braxton hicks contractions and they rarely hurt.
Between 4AM and 8AM I had several more contractions that would wake me.
All day I had irregular contractions,mostly once an hour,but some every 20 minutes.
I debated taking castor oil in hoping it would nudge him the little bit he needed,but I was already tired and it was late.Matt and I went for a few short walks and I had a few contractions,but they never got closer or more intense.

Sunday June 12,2011-39 weeks:
3:00AM-Contraction....Then another one 30 minutes later.This continued throughout the rest of the night,every 20-40 minutes I would have a contraction.
Some of them were intense enough that I would get on all-fours on the bed and had to moan through them.This was frustrating for me since with my other births once I couldn't quietly breathe through the pain I was usually getting somewhere.
I was using the bathroom a lot and feeling nauseated.Whenever I sat down (especially on the toilet!) I felt pressure and discomfort-a real familiar 'hollowing' feeling I get near delivery.But yet my contractions were 20-30 minutes apart.The odd thing is the contractions would only come on if I was laying down-when I would get up,I rarely had one.

7:30AM-I called my midwife,Linda and told her I was getting frustrated since I felt the contractions were intense enough,but not getting closer enough to call it real labor.Linda told me that it was up to me,but since I'd had good results with castor oil in the past,I might want to try it.
I wasn't thrilled about taking it so early in the day,but I decided that I would take a couple of tablespoons and see if it helped.
I took it and went to lay back down-which caused contractions.

10:00AM-I had thrown up a couple of times,but never 'ran to the bathroom'....Linda said to call her if anything changed.

1PM-My contractions were coming without having to be laying in bed...They were more intense and closer together if I sat on the toilet or squatted/got on all-fours.I knelt and leaned over my birth ball and that seemed to work good at bringing them on.

2:30PM-My efforts seemed to be working by leaning over the birth ball and rocking back and forth.I was having contractions every 5-7 minutes and I called Linda.She told me to call her when I wanted her to come over.I didn't think I was quite ready to commit to having people showing up until my contractions had been coming for awhile longer.

3PM-Contractions were still coming strong and steady,so I called my mom and then Linda.
Matt started filling up the birth pool and I stood up swaying my hips to keep gravity on my side.

3:30PM-Linda showed up.I was still nervous that I wasn't progressing or that my labor would stall.There is a huge difference between going to the hospital too soon and having people actually waiting on YOU.

4:00PM-My mom showed up.By now Caleb was asking 20 questions per minute and I felt like my contractions were spacing and decreasing in intensity due to 'mommy' overload.
I retreated to my room to labor in private and that helped.I got into the birth pool for a bit.
My friend Amy showed up around this time and saved us!! The boys were concerned about mommy and were acting up some.

4:45PM-I used the bathroom and 'lost it',boy did I 'lose it'!!By this I mean my mucus plug.
Linda listened to the baby and Matt talked me into allowing her to check me...I was at 6CM.
By now my contractions were about 3 minutes apart and the baby was very,very low.
I got back into the birth pool and my contractions were so much better to handle.I was on all-fours the whole time I was in the pool.

5:30PM-My contractions were getting much more intense..Jeremiah wanted his mommy very badly-he was concerned about me and wanted to see me-which I was ok with...The only thing that made it hard was when the boys were really upset and crying.
I was using methods I had read about in Ina Mays midwifery books,such as 'blowing' your belly up when you exhale.I was having back labor as I always do and Matt was pushing on my lower back and hips to relieve some of the pain.
I was getting a bit overwhelmed and feeling like "Maybe I can't do this.....Oh no! I don't have a choice" and then I would have to tell myself that I am a strong woman and I can do this.I felt a little gush and I said "Oh,I think my water just broke!."
Linda said "Good,that's great."
At this point the kids didn't come back into the room.....

5:45PM-My contractions were coming a lot closer and much more intense.Sometimes it seemed they were one after another.Sometimes they just seemed to last a long time.
I knew I was heading into the dreaded 'transition' phase and I was starting to fight myself mentally to keep it together.
Fear of the unknown is enough to drive anyone a little crazy in their head....Knowing I had more pain to go through was enough,but also knowing I needed to overcome and surrender to something so enormous was even more of a concern!
I was ready to just get to the pushing and hold my baby.....Matt was nervous about 'how' I would deliver.This whole thing made him feel a bit out of control and I think he just wanted as much reasurance as possible.Linda gave a brief description of how it might go,but we both told him that "I'll know when the time is right."

5:55PM-About when I entered transition....I zoned out completely.I remember thinking that my mom (who was sittin in front of me) was thinking I looked drugged out or something.Yeah,don't ask me why I was thinking that.
I kept repeating "I'm just sooo tired."
I kept letting my face dip into the water during contractions.Matt later told me he was worried I'd drown myself!
I was breathing in through my nose and breathing out making an "OOOOHHH" sound.Linda kept redirecting my voice tones lower by setting a verbal example of a lower "UUUOOOOHHH."

6:05PM-I remember thinking "Transition didn't last this long with Payton."
I kept willing myself to feel the urge to push since that would mean a close end to the pain.
Every couple of contractions (which were coming rather close and intensely) I would feel myself slipping into the mentality of "I can't do this,when will it end,it could go on forever" and then I'd have to reboot quickly and tell myself "I am a strong woman,the pain is good,my baby will be here soon,just one more contraction,FOCUS,let it go-surrender."
Matt kept asking me if I needed to push and I just said "I don't know,kinda"

6:10PM-I declared that I was feeling 'Pushy' and Linda said "That's great."
The contractions were soo intense,but I just kept telling myself how strong I was and how great I'd feel when I delivered my baby boy.
My wonderful birth team was doing great about supporting me by getting me water,putting cold cloths on me and telling me "You're doing so good" and all sorts of encouraging,calming phrases.
As usual,I was having horrible back labor and Matt was working so hard to push on my back and hips-I had to remind him a few times when the contraction ended to "Take a break" because I would need his strength really soon for the next contraction!
I was still on all-fours and I felt best this way.

6:12PM-I wasn't getting the FULL urge to push,but there was the feeling that he was moving lower and I had some pressure.
I decided to try pushing and it actually took a bit of effort this time-not too bad though.
I felt more of an urge to push even more after a few good "ouuuuummmpphhh's" and Matt asked if I was crowning,Linda checked and initially said "No",but then a second later I had given a good push and I felt some burning,but not too bad.She said "Okay,his head is out."
All I could think was "Yes!"
Normally the doctors wiggle the baby out the rest of the way with a little push from me,but Linda let me move him out on my own for the most part.

6:14PM-I actually had to push a bit harder than I anticipated to get his shoulders and chest delivered!
Still on all-fours,I heard my Linda tell me to reach down between my legs and take my little guy.
I reached down and pulled him up to my chest and sat back against the side of the pool.

I was overcome with emotions.I wanted to cry,laugh....I felt so much love and I just held him close.
I was shaking-it felt so amazing to have accomplished exactly what I had wanted to : Nobody making me feel like I wasn't competent,telling me how to do something that my body naturally knew how to accomplish.All I needed was a little knowledge,confidence and love and support from the people who were part of our birth.
These people believed in me.They understood that birth can and should be a peaceful,empowering,beautiful moment-And it was....It really was.

I nursed Jacobi right away.....He latched right on.
About 25 minutes after the birth,I spontaniously delivered the placenta while nursing Jacobi.
Linda showed us the parts of the placenta-something I found interesting,since in my other births it was just whisked away without a second thought.
We waited until about 35 minutes after Jacobi's birth to do anything with the umbilical cord.
Matt happily cut the cord,sending Jacobi into life on his own,no longer attatched to his previous 'life-support' that he no longer needed.

Nobody took him until I was ready.And He was given to his daddy then.And then his grandma.
I felt more womanly and motherly-probably because I was respected throughout my labor and delivery....I was made to feel like a confident,strong beautiful woman who could take on this experience and through surrenduring to it could (and did) do more than survive.Survive isn't a fair word for bringing a baby into the world.

I EXPERIENCED the experience of a lifetime.



Jacobi

No comments:

Post a Comment